S p i r i t ua l i t y S t u d i e s 2 - 2 Fa l l 2 0 1 6 2 3 Sharon Lauricella ing a meaningful task, completing a good deed, or even via extending a generous gift. The subject-subject relationship as Buber describes it was particularly important as I acknowledged students. I wanted my students – both current and former – to feel recognized and met as equals on a level far more important than an exchange of anything material or tangible. My search for a framework for this spiritual experiment was not plentiful; there is indeed a dearth of literature on acknowledgement. The most helpful work was Hyde’s (2006) monograph, which argues that acknowledgement is a communicative gift that bonds human beings together, and helps to create human solidarity. Hyde suggests that the fundamental element in acknowledgement is awe – being aware of others creates a sense of respect and wonder which serves as the foundation for acknowledgement. As a practice, Hyde adds cautiously, acknowledgement must toe the delicate balance of altruism and ego, whereby one benefits from being acknowledged, yet must be careful to not slip into selfishness. Hyde’s work contributes to the area of communication ethics, and Arnett (2008) suggests that a study of acknowledgement deserves “ongoing consideration” (Arnett 2008, 28). The other venue in which acknowledgment has been discussed is business and leadership. Umlas (2006) suggests that acknowledging others for their contributions leads to positive professional results, can neutralize jealousy, and build stronger relationships. She also argues that acknowledgement leads to increased engagement on the part of business employees, and leads to better results at work (Umlas 2013). I agree with Umlas’s premises, though I suggest that acknowledgement as she describes it is too close to gratitude (the title of her second monograph, Grateful Leadership, is indicative of her perception of a very close if not inseparable link between the two concepts). In reading Umlas’s work, it appears that she is focused perhaps too much on what someone has done for others – the notion of benefit appears too explicit. Acknowledgement, as I conceive of it, recognizes a quality, skill or ideal in someone that deserves positive remark whether it builds business performance or not. Certainly the practice of acknowledgement is wellplaced in the business arena, though I suggest that Umlas is too focused on measureable outcomes than personal qualities. Overall, I suspected that most of the people with whom I associated did not receive as much acknowledgement as they would have liked, and certainly not enough to create what Hyde describes as “excessive selfishness” (Hyde 2006, 220). I was particularly interested in qualities such as loyalty, inclusivity, diligence, and patience – all of these qualities can lead to success, wellbeing, and even business performance or profit. However, I was interested not so much about what someone did to further measureable outcomes, but rather, a person’s individual qualities, talents, or skills, without an explicit focus on outcome. Further, I certainly had a divine message that I ought to reach out to and connect with people in my life who had made a difference to me, to others, or to the community. Hence, my acknowledgement experiment. 2.3 From Start to Everyday Practice In December, 2015, I began my personal inquiry into an acknowledgement practice. At this time, the fall semester was coming to a close, and I was beginning to plan the winter semester. My experiment fit with course planning for the winter term at the university. As part of the Nonviolent Communication course that I teach, students embark on a peace project: a self-directed personal experiment or project that they had never done before. The project must make a difference in their lives or the lives of others (some projects in the past included visiting a different place of worship every week for the whole semester, enlisting family members in an active recycling program at home, writing a series of short stories, or creating a series of works of art within a particular theme). Each year, I conduct my own project alongside students in order that I am an active participant in the course. In planning the 2016 iteration of the course, I decided that in keeping with my self-imposed expectation to complete a project, I would acknowledge at least one person a day until the completion of the winter semester (30 April). My acknowledgement project held specific parameters, expectations, and processes. I felt strongly that my acknowledgements should be handwritten. Like Kralik (2012) embraced in his very successful report about his practice of gratitude, I believe that handwritten notes feel special and sincere. Advice on not abandoning the handwritten letter abounds (for example, Hall 2015; Post 2014); overall sentiments are such that the thoughtfulness and permanence of handwritten letters make them superior to often hastily-written, rather impermanent digital communication. Further, Hyde (2006) cautions that the line between acknowledgement and the self-centred demand for immediacy is thin; therefore he suggests being wary of overusing technology in communique pertaining to acknowledgement. To this end, I retrieved my copy of Workman’s (2015) You Are Doing a Freaking Great Job (which was already on my bookshelf – I purchased it on impulse in a bookstore several
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